As You Are

There has always been a word or two I've left unsaid. A spiteful or biting remark I've left behind. I can never find the expression of care or gratitude until you're already gone and then when I find you again the hurt comes flooding back with new venom. For once I'd like to tell you in words untainted that I never want to see you fall. I may not be there to catch you and even if I were I don't know if I could.. I'm not sure I'd want to. You wanted an angel. Instead you found where demons hide and monsters lurk. I wanted to tell you that I want to see you grow. That I want to watch you become everything you thought you never could be. That I want you to hold onto your dreams, because that hope helps keep you alive. That I want to see you take hold of deaths hand and bring it to it's knees. I want to see you conquer fear and work it for yourself. I want to see you as the man I see behind the mortal facade. I never want to see you lose to the monsters you create.. or the ones you attract. I wanted to tell you all this and more, but I could never find the words. I'd always find others. Words less.. kind.. Words of wanting and desire and greed. I tell you dark things, but how long has it been since I've told you something light? How long has it been since I've simply told you, I love you?